The Hoosierist

When every other person passing you on the Monon offers some sort of greeting, it gets pretty old.

Q: I know Long’s is famous for its yeast doughnuts, but what’s the second-best thing on the bakery’s menu?

Carol C., Carmel

Q: I understand that the orangutans for the Indianapolis Zoo’s new exhibit are already holed up on the grounds someplace. Where are they staying, what do they do all day, and can I see them?

Victoria W., Indianapolis

Q: What can the astronomers at Butler’s Holcomb Observatory actually see? Indy’s light pollution is so bad, I can only make out a few stars from my backyard.

Jason H., Indianapolis

Q: Recent surveys place Indiana among the fattest states and high on the list for smoking. Are there any surveys that rank the state high for something good?

Q: Do we have mountain lions? I have a relative in Southern Indiana who insists they’ve returned.

Benjamin C., Indianapolis

Q: Someone told me that the restaurant where I eat pork tenderloin sandwiches is serving a fake—something called a pork fritter. What, exactly, is an “authentic” pork tenderloin, and are they really that hard to obtain? 

Q: I read that my license to carry a handgun is no good in Ohio. What gives?

Hank M., Carmel

Q: I caught a glimpse of the guy who drives my neighborhood’s ice-cream truck. He’s so sketchy looking, it made me wonder what else they sell out of that van. Are these people vetted?

William E., Indianapolis

Q: How do the Conner Prairie reenactors keep from passing out on hot days? Those hoop skirts don’t look practical.

Ashlie P. Carmel

A. Sorry, bug-o-phobes, the threat posed by these tiny home invaders is not, like a lice infestation, all in our heads. The problem is so widespread that the Marion County Public Health Department actually has a full-time “bedbug guy,” Larry Lobdell, traveling the county offering tips on keeping the pests out of homes, apartment buildings, and hotels.

A: TV’s Gomer Pyle owes his pre-race role to an incident in 1972, when legendary Speedway boss Anton “Tony” Hulman asked him to participate in the opening ceremonies. But Tony didn’t approach him months in advance like regular folks would. Instead he walked up to Nabors (who was attending the ’72 race as a spectator) and asked him if he’d like to “sing the song.” Nabors, figuring it was “The Star-Spangled Banner,” said yes. It wasn’t until moments before his performance that he learned it was “Back Home Again in Indiana.” Ever the trouper, he wrote the lyrics on his hand and delivered a bang-up performance, earning a gig he’s honored for the better part of four decades. [Editor’s Note: Nabors won’t make it to the 2012 Indy 500 due to medical reasons.]

Q: Is it safe to eat fish from Indiana waterways? Some of them are pretty nasty.

Julia S., Fishers A: It depe

A: Mayor Ballard’s administration has racked up sister cities faster than a teenage girl friending classmates on Facebook. Before he came to office, Indy buddied up to Taipei, Taiwan, in 1978; to Cologne, Germany, in 1988; to Monza, Italy, in 1994; and to Piran, Slovenia, in 2001. Then came Ballard. According to Jane Gehlhausen, his director of international and cultural affairs, he targeted cities in economically vibrant nations with populations around 1 million and industries similar to those of Central Indiana.

Aaron P., Indianapolis